eWiCa’s viBe!

I don’t know whose side I’m takin’
But I’m not takin’ things too well
I can see inside you’re achin’
But is it still too early for me to tell?

I try to help you out through the hardest of times
Your heart is in your throat and I’m speaking my mind
Though it looks as if it’s over
I’m still not over you

‘Cause I still love you like I did before
I know for sure that you still feel the same way I do
If only she knew
Whoa, if only she knew, oh

I try to let it go
but I don’t know if I can take it
‘Cause the way you looked at me
Made me see that I can’t really fake it

I try to help you out through
the hardest of times
Your heart is in your throat and I’m speaking my mind
Though it looks as if it’s over
I’m still not over you

‘Cause I still love you like I did before
I know for sure that you still feel the same way I do
If only she knew

I know she loves you and I can’t interfere
So I’ll just have to sit back and watch my world disappear

I try to help you out through
the hardest of times
Your heart is in your throat and I’m speaking my mind
Though it looks as if it’s over
I’m still not over you
Oh, I’m still not over you

‘Cause I still love you like I did before
I know for sure that you still feel the same way I do
‘Cause I will never ever walk away
I’ll find a way
She could never love you like I do
If only she knew

If only she knew…

Here’s my wish list

First one i would create a heart changing love
Second one I’ll take yours and fill it all the way up
Third one but i don’t need a lot of wishes cause I’ll be okay if i get one

If i had one wish we would be best friends
Love would never end it would just begin
If i had one wish you would be my boo
Promise to love you trust me I’ll trust you
If i had one wish we would run away
making love all day have us a baby
If i had one wish I’d make you my whole life
And you’d be my hubby make it right this time
If i had one wish…
I don’t even know how we ended upon this road

Pink it’s my new obsession
Pink it’s not even a question
Pink on the lips of your lover, ’cause
Pink is the love you discover
Pink as the bing on your cherry
Pink ’cause you are so very
Pink it’s the color of passion
`Cause today it just goes with the fashion

Pink it was love at first sight, yea
Pink when I turn out the light, and
Pink gets me high as a kite
And I think everything is going to be all right
No matter what we do tonight

You could be my flamingo
‘Coz pink is the new kinda lingo
Pink like a deco umbrella
It’s kink - but you don’t ever tell her

Pink it was love at first sight
Pink when I turn out the light
Pink gets me high as a kite
And I think everything is going to be all right
No matter what we do tonight

I want to be your lover
I wanna wrap you in rubber
As pink as the sheets that we lay on
Pink is my favorite crayon, yeah
Pink it was love at first sight
Pink when I turn out the light
Pink it’s like red but not quite
And I think everything is going to be all right
No matter what we do tonight

You know I love music
And every time I hear something hot
It makes me wanna move
It makes me wanna have fun
But it’s something about this joint right here
This joint right here
Its makes me wanna…..Woooh

Let it go……
Can’t let this thing called love get away from you
Feel free right now, going do what you want to do
Can’t let nobody take it away, from you, from me, from we
No time for moping around, are you kidding?
And no time for negative vibes, cause I’m winning
It’s been a long week, I put in my hardest
Gonna live my life, feels so good to get it right

So I like what I see when I’m looking at me
When I’m walking past the mirror
No stress through the night, at a time in my life
Ain’t worried about if you feel it
Got my head on straight, I got my mind right
I aint gonna let you kill it
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just…..

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just fine

Feels so good, when you’re doing all the things that you want to do
Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new
Keep your head up high
In yourself, believe in you, believe in me
Having a really good time, I’m not complaining
And I’m a still wear a smile if it raining
I got to enjoy myself regardless
I appreciate life, I’m so glad I got mine
So I like what I see when I’m looking at me

When I’m walking past the mirror
Aint worried about you and what you gonna do
I’m a lady so I must stay classy
Got to keep it hot, keep it together
If I want to get better
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just…..
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I won’t change my life, my life’s just fine

I aint gon’ let nothing get in my way
(I ain’t gone let nobody bring me down, no, no, no)
No matter what nobody has to say
(No way, no way, no way)
I ain’t gon’ let nothing get in my way
No matter what nobody has to say

Feels so good, when you’re doing all the things that you want to do
Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new
It’s a really good thing to say
That I won’t change my life, my life’s just fine

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I won’t change my life, my life’s just fine

So I like what I see when I’m looking at me
When I’m walking past the mirror
No stress through the night, at a time in my life
Ain’t worried about if you feel it
Got my head on straight, I got my mind right
I ain’t gonna let you kill it
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just…..

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just fine

I must say, life has been so great!!!

Having back the VIP access with clubs, dancing all night, driving yourself home, hanging out with friends, meeting people, and etc.

Yes, my social life is alive again. haha! Few things that you have to remember, is to have fun, don’t look for someone to hook up with, stay sober, go home alone, enjoy the music and dance the night away.

Moving on or closure doesn’t mean that you need another person to get that. It is basically accepting the fact that you and that person can’t be together.
It was painful for me, really it was! And I know that it took longer that expected. But wow, I really just got over you. I’m not mad, not upset and no pain anymore. I guess after a long time, I am complete again. I lost myself, now I found myself again.
Lets face it, when you get involved with someone for a long time, it is just different when you are alone again. It was different, hard and scary. Thinking that I can never move on.
Thank you my longtime ex boyfriend, you know who you are, congratulations and Best Wishes to you and your future wife. You made me a stronger person and you made me "grow up" and learn so much about life and my own emotions. You made me realize how important it is to take my time and enjoy myself. I’m glad that you and "her"got back together and realize that you are for each other. I am just not ready to take the "next level" and give up my beliefs. No matter what happens, God will always be number 1 for me and my family. They inspire me and I know no matter what happens, they are there.
And for Mr. Complicated. Yes, I am complicated too. But THANK YOU, I know that there were "too many" great things that happened that made it "too good to be true" that resulted to expectations and became complications. What I had was true, but it was too early. I was too scared to let go of something so great. It was fun, exciting, dramatic, and memorable. You know there are a lot of things ahead of you. I’ve moved on and forgot you. I think you should give the girl that you have now a shot. Just forget your ex, its been how many years already. Its weird, now that everything is over, I know you so well now and now I know why things are complicated. You are such a great friend, really. I still treat you as a friend. I know that we are in a world that it is just too small for us, it really is at work and our friends. You should start being honest to yourself for you to accept that happened in the past. At some point, we all had to go through the "mad love" and it is ok, those things made us realize that we were stupid and learn from it. But it doesn’t mean that you just stop there. The real challenge is how you would move on after.
It broke my heart when I got back from my trip and thinking that we will be back to the start. But then when I got back, i was lowered to the things that made me think that we are okay. Everyone knew, but me. And right before Christmas I see you with her and your bestfriend, which is my bestfriend too, was caught in between. I know he knew since but didn’t want to hurt me. That scene hurt me, oh really. Big time. But you know, i guess it was what I needed to accept it. Painful but afterwards, it was the closure that I’ve been looking for. Weird how things turned out to be. There has been great things to me after the pain. You made me a better person and stronger too. I can now understand everything complicated around me, not all really but mostly. Don’t be confused if I am being nice to you. My intentions is just to be friends with you especially at work.
Thank you to all of you that made me like this. I’m so glad that you were a part of my life, now i’m confident and ready to face more ahead of me.

Yes, I am SUPERFOXY! No doubts about it, right? haha! So much confidence huh?
When I got up this morning, I just can’t help but I can’t help to write about everything. How I finally moved on completely, closure and everything! Funny but true, I thought that this day would never come. I know that I had a few hang ups, my friends are getting tried of hearing all my sob stories, crying before I go to sleep, still crying when I get up, and more.
I will admit that yes, I had to go through the pathetic, painful, depressing break up that we all go through. At some point in my life, I guess I was crazy. HAHA!
I am now laughing at myself, because looking back, it was really crazy.
2 days before Christmas, when I was at a point of just moving on and forgetting everything. Guess what, i found out my long term ex boyfriend is getting married and a guy that I thought that would be taking the next step was seeing someone else. And guess what? It was just the closure that I needed.
Finally!

Just suddenly occurred to me, when my closest friend suddenly receives an SMS message: "Make sure that you are free on Sunday for your gown fitting…" (sounds familiar?!) and guess who that was from? no one else but my long term ex boyfriend! Yes, he is getting married, this year, this June, at the place where I always wanted to tie the knot. Hmmm….
I was on my way home, while driving, listening to my music, then my other friend asked me: "How do you feel about it?" then I paused while the red light was in front of me… Suddenly, my tears started to drop while waiting for the red light to turn green.
I’ve been asked many times this question if I was hurt, yes I am, so hurt. I know it may seem that I won’t show or talk about it with anyone, I just want to be honest and I know that maybe a few of you just didn’t know if its okay to ask.
I know its been 2 years already, but why do I still feel pain? Because he never knew why I had to let him go. I know that my relationship with him is almost close to perfect and I know it is the same thing with him.
It was hard for the both of us, really. Someone told me what he had to go through, I didn’t know that not until I was told. I thought that it was just me who was having a hard time. So painful to know this just now, so many questions and things that I want to tell him. Well, i guess those things are better left unsaid. I know that he is old enough to make decisions for himself and he knows what is best for him.
I can just hope for the best for him and her. I’m glad that he has someone within his religion that will be accepted by everyone. But one thing is for sure before that he didn’t know, I was willing to give up even my own beliefs just for him, he just had to wait. Because I didn’t want to do it for him but I wanted that to come from me, even it meant giving up everything, even my own family just for him. I just needed time, but what he did was he left me..

by Ne-yo

I cant get it back, but
I dont want it back, i
Realized that,
She dont know how to act
Never been a dumb dude
No im not dense
I Just had a slight lack
Of common sense
I was the good guy
She was the bad girl
Im thinking one girl
She thinking me, earl
james and jimmy
Yep she had plenty
But love for me, she didnt have any

I was inviting, her into my heart
But she was out riding in
some other man’s car
She was my night time,
thought I was her star
Guess I was wrong,
but see im strong
Wont take me long for me to move on

[ Hook: ]
Please dont worry bout me im fine
(Please dont worry bout me im fine)
Only gonna play the fool one time
(Only gonna play the fool one time)
Trust me when I say
That i’ll be ok
Go on girl
(Go on girl)
Go on girl
(Go on girl)
Go on girl

[ V2: ]
I cant get it back, but
I dont want it back, i
Realized that,
She dont know how to act
Tried to settle down and
look what I get
Thought it was my time,
but I guess not yet
[ Lyrics found at www.mp3lyrics.org/nY ]
She at the bar getting
drinks from many men
Im in the house,
thinking shes with her
girlfriends
Trust not knowing,
truly not knowing
I look back now like,
man, I was open

I was inviting, her into my heart
But she was out riding in
some other man’s car
She was my night time,
thought I was her star
Guess I was wrong,
but see im strong
Wont take me long for me to move on

[ Hook: ]
Please dont worry bout me im fine
(Please dont worry bout me im fine)
Only gonna play the fool one time
(Only gonna play the fool one time)
Trust me when I say
That i’ll be ok
Go on girl
(Go on girl)
Go on girl
(Go on girl)
Go on girl

[ Bridge ]
The mistake i made is clear
(we never shoulda been together)
Thats the reason youre not here
(I know that I can do much better)
Not a single salty tear
Not a feeling in my chest
Baby im feeling no stress
Im too fly to be depressed

Go on Girl
Go on Girl
Go on Girl
Go on Girl

[ Hook: ]
Please dont worry bout me im fine
(Please dont worry bout me im fine)
Only gonna play the fool one time
(Only gonna play the fool one time)
Trust me when I say
That i’ll be ok
Go on girl
(Go on girl)
Go on girl
(Go on girl)
Go on girl

CLOSURE can mean a lot of things in Philosophy and Math. But as far as romance is concerned, closure is the right word for the complete conclusion of a relationship.

It is that distinct sense of freedom from all the grudges, bitterness and resentments that a bad breakup may have brought. Closure is also freedom from wishful thinking, false hopes and incessant novenas for the loved one to come back. Simply put, when you’ve found closure, it means you know it’s over, and it’s just okay that way.

The question is: When do you say "It’s over and it’s just okay?"

A normal person won’t be happy to end a relationship that’s been a part of his/her life, especially if the relationship has lasted for a significant length of time. Still, it does not mean that no normal person would end a relationship. In fact, a mentally sound person would know when a relationship should come to an end.

Following are some of the possible scenarios that can lead to a breakup (not in any order): lack of common interests, infidelity, boredom, pride, selfishness, arrogance, insensitivity, the presence of a third party, etc. Some relationships overcome, some try to overcome; but not every relationship can overcome these issues.

Let’s face it: Everybody wants something more — especially if he or she ends up with people who are used to giving much less than what they can actually give.

Once the stage of being so blindly in love is over and all the romantic issues are exposed, it becomes increasingly more difficult to stay, especially when things just get worse day by day. (Sometimes, they don’t really get worse; they just become more obvious.)

Then once the limit for overcoming is met, the breakup happens. If you’ve been around, or have friends who have been around, you’ll know for sure that breakups never just happen. A breakup is always the end result of a series of unpleasant events. Falling out of love is merely one of these unpleasant occurrences.

In an ideal breakup, one partner says it’s over, and the other agrees and even feels relieved that the breakup need not come from him/her, or that finally, the breakup happened before the relationship got any deeper or more serious.

Annie Reed’s (Meg Ryan) breakup with her fiancé in "Sleepless in Seattle" is a classic example of a clean, smooth and ideal breakup. Minutes after breaking up with the guy she can’t afford to marry, she’s with Sam Baldwin (Tom Hanks) and they are free to start a new relationship without fear of being stalked, threatened, humiliated or cursed.

We all wish every breakup is like that. But not everyone finds closure fast and easy, especially when there are no Sam Baldwins or Annie Reeds meeting on top of the Empire State Building. Enough about the movies! In real life, closure does not come easily to everyone. This is because not everyone understands why breakups need to happen.

In a funny way, even with a list of a thousand reasons for a breakup, the other party would still think that the issues could be worked out. This is tricky, because once you hear of a reason leading to a breakup, it should be quite evident that your loved one is unhappy with you. And once you start coming up with a rebuttal, it only means you’re making an argument, not to save the relationship, but to prove that you’re right.

On the one hand, it’s good to "fight" for your love. On the other hand, what would you be fighting for if the other person has decided to move on? Where is the "love" in that person?

Different marks

I’ve seen people who found it hard to let go because they thought the reasons given to them were lame and irrational. They try to argue back, without realizing that the reasons were only lame and irrational to them because they’re looking at their relationship in different ways. They’re not on the same page. They’re going on different directions. They’re not aiming for the same marks. Therefore, it does not make sense for them to continue on a journey together.

Who is "the third party?" This androgynous character is so notorious for breaking up a lot of relationships. Poor Third Party, even when you’re not the real reason, others would still put the blame on you, not getting that you won’t be in the scene without much help from the first or second party.

People just give you too much credit because you’re easier to blame. In "My Best Friend’s Wedding," Julianne Potter (Julia Roberts) couldn’t let go of Michael O’Neal (Dermot Mulroney) who was getting married to someone he just met. So with much conviction, she told her gay friend George (Rupert Everett), "I can make him happier than her." To which George replied, "Is this about winning?"

Unfortunately, it is so easy to forget that love is not about winning, or comparing yourself to anyone whom your love interest has chosen to marry. "Love is always about giving and setting free". (thats why I’m setting you free now…)

You can wallow over a broken heart all your life. Or, you can just begin to live with the fact that your relationship may be over, but your life is not, and at the rate the population is increasing on this planet, there’s a good chance you’ll meet someone new and begin a new relationship.

Form your own closure by accepting that it’s over and love is not about winning. It’s always about the journey.

Again, question: When do you say that "It’s over and it’s just okay?"

Answer: Whenever you’re willing and ready. (Keep saying you’re not, and you never will be.)